Meghan McCain and her family has a history with racism
Meghan McCain is currently a host on ABC’s ‘The View’. Her views, behaviour and hypocrisy have earned her the ire of the general public. Her hypocritical comments have overshadowed her disgusting and bullish demeanour with other hosts. She has attacked her beloved ‘Uncle Lindsey Graham’ for condoning Donald Trump’s racist comments against freshman Congresswomen. However, she has forgotten her own history of racism.
McCain was very upset on The View when her late father’s best friend, Lindsey Graham for supporting Trump’s racist comments on Fox and Friends. McCain has observed politics her entire life. After observing Graham, who has leeched off the famous politicians his whole life to stay relevant is doing the same with Trump. Graham has even admitted this to reporters.
So, when Graham is doing the same now, why is she offended? No, McCain is not offended because Graham has supported Trump’s racist comments against the freshman Congresswomen, she’s upset because Graham has switched sides and has ditched the late Senator McCain. Trump has attacked Senator McCain so many times, since the beginning of his Presidential campaign, but Graham has not exactly condemned President Trump.
This is not a hunch, but an observation. McCain has shed fake tears on The View and blamed Congresswoman Ilhan Omar, who derided AIPAC, the lobbying group that advocates pro – Israel politics in the U.S., not the existence of Israel. McCain does not have Jewish ancestry, but claims that former VP candidate ‘Joe Libermann’, who are actually Jewish, ‘are her family’. So, the very same woman, who cried wolf, is now upset that Graham has backed Trump for saying the same thing she did? There are not two different things. Not at all.
The four Congresswomen in question, Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, Rashida Tlaib, Ayana Pressley and Ilahn Omar were told by Trump on Twitter to go back to wherever they came from. Expect Rep. Omar, all of them were born in the States. Omar fled Somalia and became a naturalised U.S. citizen. She has worked tirelessly for her constituents for the last five months. It was the U.S. that granted her asylum. All of them have criticised Trump’s comments, and he has received backlash for it.
McCain’s argument that all Republicans aren’t racist is hard to believe, since she is the embodiment of racism herself. But, Republican’s are racist. Even her father Senator McCain, darkened President Obama’s skin and smeared him, during the 2008 election campaign. Trump has made several racist comments during the two and half years as President. She has not made a big deal out of any of them. Its only because the man she loved as a family member, Lindsey Graham betrayed her trust, that she’s throwing tantrums.
McCain worked at Fox News for many years, and Fox News is clearly known for spreading falsehoods, creating fear against minorities and dog whistling. If McCain was really offended by the racism, why didn’t she say anything when the right-wing was circulating doctored videos of Rep. Tlaib who apparently wanted the holocaust to occur? Of course Rdp. Tlaib didn’t. McCain wasn’t offended when the right-wing put a picture of Rep.Omar with the fall of the WTO, with caption, ‘You forgot’. Meaning, you let Muslims in and will let 9/11 happen again.
McCain’s evangelical beliefs make her pro-Israel, not anti-racist. She has never stood up for women of colour. She clearly is playing politics again, and is masking her hatred and outrage for Graham, by using this opportunity as a mask. Clever. McCain has rarely condemned Trump’s history of rape, going as far as to doubt the victim, despite 22 women accusing him.
This woman is incorrigible, and proves the statement that ‘hypocrisy is at its finest’.
But one among them stands out the most is Independent Senator for Vermont. He’s a second time Presidential hopeful, having challenged Hillary Clinton in the 2015 primaries. After Clinton pilfered the primaries from Sanders, he conceded, but this time around he’s vowed to challenge the establishment.
Bernie Sanders is the trail blazer of the Progressive movement in the United States. He is a visionary, whose ideas have garnered followers from both Millennial and Generation Z, some of whom are not eligible to even vote. He was relatively unknown outside the state of Vermont, and now is the Democratic front runner of the 2020. He has 1 million volunteers for his campaign this year and raised 5 million dollars in one day for his campaign.
Here are four reasons to support this candidate:
He’s a women’s rights activist – Sanders has a history of fighting for women’s rights. He has tried to pass bills against violence against women, equal pay for gender, free healthcare for women, and he is a pro-choice candidate. He has co-sponsored many bills in the senate to fight for these issues and always writes articles that are pro-women and for equality. In his campaign, he has recruited women who comprise of 50 percent of his campaign staff. Women of all backgrounds and colour are in his campaign, making it more diverse than ever. There several videos of him on C-Span advocating for women’s rights and he participated in the women’s march after Trump’s election. When women who worked in his 2015 campaign complained about sexual harassment, he personally apologised and dealt with the issue instantly.
He wants to prevent climate change – unlike his centrist colleagues in the Democratic party, Sanders has pledged to end the use of fossil fuels and fracking. He is well-informed on climate change, and calls it an immediate national security threat. He has supported the passing of the ‘Green New Deal’ proposed by Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, which vows to promote climate resilience and create more green jobs. He has addressed the issue of climate change in many of his speeches. Bernie has served on key Senate committees such as the “Environment and Public Works” and the “Energy and Natural Resources” committees.
Free education – Sanders has always advocated for free college tuition for students. He is well aware of the mounting debt American students have to face once they graduate from college. His progressive tax plans ensures that universities get the required funding, whilst students get to study whichever course they want for free. He mentions in his book, ‘Guide to political revolution‘ that wants students to enter the job market and not avoid going to college, just to avoid the vicious circle of poverty.
Free healthcare – it was Sanders who started the idea of having free healthcare in the country. He is the pioneer of the progressive movement, when his ideas were considered ridiculous. Today, even Conservatives find his plan alluring. The issue that is of utmost importance and urgency today, and even Democrats at the centre have agreed to pass a bill for free healthcare, once the Democrats take control of the senate and the White House.
Bernie Sanders is surging through the polls and is gaining popularity, despite severe backlash from the mainstream media. He is the only Social Democrat and Progressive serving the Senate today, with over a decade of experience. His is often credited for starting a political revolution in the USA, and has kept this momentum alive through his books, speeches and debates.
Theresa May is the current Prime Minister, former Home Secretary, Councillor and leader of the Tory party. May is the worst Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, beating Tony Blair who led the British troops into Iraq. She is disliked by members of her own party, as she is deeply unpopular. She is often ridiculed, by British and EU comedians and TV show hosts for her poor administrative skills.
There are several reasons why Theresa May is a terrible leader, and even worse of a human being. As Home Secretary, she has made several anti-immigrant statements, all of them subtly, because she’s British of course. The most famous among them is : “Immigration harms social cohesion.”
Clearly, she is unaware of the fact that EU and non-EU immigrants have helped create her great conglomerate of islands. While the EU immigrants work in the agriculture sector, food sector and retail, some of them even run businesses. The non-EU residents work in engineering, medical science and transport as well. Both EU and non-EU residents do manual, menial and prestigious jobs, unlike some of the British, who are too ‘posh’ or unqualified to do any of the jobs immigrants do. Immigrants are the secret ingredient to any popular recipe. Either she’s daft or pretending to be ignorant. Or she’s just racist.
She was ‘nominated’, not elected as Prime Minister. Since then, she has caused nothing but trouble to the British public and immigrants. Let’s start with the latter. She made it mandatory for those who approach NHS hospitals to furnish their passports, to check if they were legally in the country or not. Yes, it is possible to obtain an NHS number illegally, but it is inhumane to turn away women who have driven 50 miles in the cold to give birth. Calling it a crack down on health tourism, many legal immigrants have been affected by this. Anybody who is not British, to be precise, does not look British, is asked for ID proof. Opposition Labour leader, Jeremy Corbyn challenged May on this during the Prime Minister’s question time, and got a non-answer as usual. If this is not obvious that she is racist, then what is?
Being unable to have children herself, one would expect compassion from May. Claiming that Christianity helped her overcome grief of not having children, it seems paradoxical. Doesn’t Christianity preach love and compassion for those in need? Even if they are legal or illegal immigrants? Maybe not for May.
But, being the good Samaritan she is, she took charge of the country, and handled Brexit. Oh wait, she was a Remainer. She wanted to stay in the EU, unlike he former boss, David Cameron, who is obviously more racist that she is. He argued with Angela Merkel and Francis Hollande that he did not want EU immigrants claiming welfare if they have been in the UK just a year or two. He wanted them to pay taxes and must have resided in the country for at least five years. The EU comprised and allowed the UK to provide welfare to those who have been in the country for at least three years. Theresa May did nothing to stop this. Where’s the compassion Theresa? Surely, the Home Secretary would have the Prime Minister’s ear?
May promised not to call an election, and guess what? Not even a month later, she called a snap election? And she lost! She had to form a coalition with the DUP, an Irish party, in order to maintain the majority in the House of Commons. Talk about keeping her word.
Once May gained power, she fired, sorry reshuffled her entire cabinet and spent every Wednesday insulting Jeremy Corbyn, the opposition leader during the PMQ. May did not come up with a Brexit deal until the last minute. She did come up with a 585 page Brexit plan, only to have her own cabinet resign, INCLUDING the Brexit Secretary, Brexit Minister and the list goes on. Her plan is so awful, those in charge of Brexit want nothing to do with her train wreck. Her deal to leave the EU was rejected thrice, let that sink in, thrice.
The woman is insane enough, and is planning to hold another vote. The way she’s handling Brexit is ever more fantastic! Britain was scheduled to leave the EU on March 29, 2019. That has not happened, May got an extension to April 11, 2019, and now the latest extension is June 30, 2019. This charade can go on forever, until the EU gets fed up. They are already preparing for a no deal Brexit.
A reporter rightly asked May, “Have you no shame in asking for another extension?”
She obviously ignored the question.
The icing on the cake is that she has offered to resign if they accept her preposterous proposal, whichis even more incredulous than her bigotry. If the parliament has rejected it thrice, then it evidently means that it’s greatly flawed. She is making the pro-Brexiteers, the remainers and everybody else along with the EU, absolutely furious. She’s not giving anybody what they want, and neither is she telling the EU what Britain wants.
After her deal was rejected the second time, Corbyn introduced the no confidence motion against her, only for her to emerge victorious by 12 votes. That’s right 12, and mind you the Conservative Party has the majority in the parliament. Not by many, by they still are the majority. Nobody has confidence in her anymore. Nobody is questioning her intelligence, loyalty for Britain or her steel nerves or thick skin. Its just her policies, her capabilities and her actual vision for a post-Brexit UK.
Finally, in a bid to save her train wreck of a legacy, she finally, mind you finally decided to actively involve the opposition party into the Brexit negotiations. Smart move Theresa. You are aware that Corbyn cares about the UK, and if anything goes wrong in the future, you can blame the socialist who wants to actually help.
And this is not the last character flaw in her personality. She did not apologise for the Jallianwala Bagh massacre. That’s right, The British who are experts at issuing fake apologies, did not apologise for the horrific massacre that killed thousands in India in 1919. She expressed her ‘remorse’. That’s right. Not regret, remorse. There’s a difference between the two words.
Regret – you wish you hadn’t done that.
Remorse – I am sad that it happened, but I don’t regret doing it.
So there it is, the nation that plundered, looted, raped majority of the world now wants to leave the EU because there too many immigrants flowing. Ah, the irony of it all.
Leyton-born Iqra Ahmed has been wearing the hijab since the age of seven. The hijab is a head scarf worn by Muslim women. As there has been a steady rise in Islamophobia in the UK, Muslim women wearing the niqab, hijab or burkha are being subjected to physical attacks and violence. But this hasn’t deterred or invoked fear in 21 –year- old Ahmed, a law student at Greenwich University. In order to dispel the misconception that the hijab is worn out of compulsion and to fight Islamophobia, she continues to wear it.
Why do women wear the niqab, hijab or burkha? Is it mandatory or optional?
These garments symbolise modesty. I feel it’s a personal choice, as far as I am concerned. I wear it because I want to. No one has ever forced me, but religiously speaking, it’s said that you just have to dress modestly. I wear it because I feel better with it. Although there might be some cases where women are compelled. It really does depends on the type of family. I am aware that families do pressure girls to wear certain type of clothing.
Have people reacted differently when they see you in these clothes after the Paris attacks?
I haven’t had anyone treating me differently. Thankfully, I have never encountered any incident like that but I know some people who have been attacked because they wear a hijab. It’s shocking. I do think that after the Paris attacks it has become more hostile for Muslims.
There are numerous hate crimes against Muslim women in the UK. Does that ever evoke fear in you?
Sometimes yes. I do think that what is happening to other girls when they are just out and about could also happen to me. I do fear that.
Have you ever considered not wearing the hijab because you might be attacked?
Well, so far I haven’t. As I haven’t really faced any prejudice. I haven’t really thought that I should take it off, and why should I? Just because of few ignorant people who might hurt me? It’s my choice. Only my mother has shown concern at times, but she wasn’t adamant that I have to take it off. She just said she wouldn’t mind if I did decide to not wear it.
In California, a student who was wearing a hijab was given the name ‘ISIS’ in the school yearbook, which outraged her and numerous Muslims. Do you think racism and anti-Muslim feelings will take the time to fade, or continue to manifest?
I think that because of ISIS, there is an inclination that this kind of racism and prejudice might increase both in the United States and the United Kingdom.
As there is an atmosphere of Islamophobia in Europe, do you feel safe travelling around your city and Europe while wearing the hijab?
Yes I do feel safe. I still believe that Europe is very tolerant. There are few ignorant people in Europe, but there are oblivious and racist people everywhere around the world. I have no reason to fear, or hide my identity.
In Switzerland, there are heavy fines levied on women for wearing these traditional clothes. Though this country is democracy, why do you think they lack secularism?
I feel that countries which levy such taxes are very hypocritical as they pretend to be democratic, yet they are evoking women’s liberty. The existing fear that the hijab is somehow promoting terrorism or these clothes are associated with terrorism are a reason to ban it. But it just shows how ignorant and stereotypical they really are.
What is the biggest misconception the world has about Muslim women and the hijab?
People believe that Muslim women wear such clothes because it’s an imposition. But a lot of women wear it because it’s their personal choice. It is a decision that they make. Sometimes, their families don’t even want them to wear it, but they still wear it because they want to.
Hillary Clinton is a former Presidential candidate, who is one of the most unpopular candidates despite having a list of accomplishments. She is a former First Lady of Arkansas, First Lady of the United States, former Senator of New York and former Secretary of State. And yet, she only received 3 million more votes than Donald Trump and still lost. She has been described as a sketchy, shady and untrustworthy character. Though she is a better choice than Trump, 1 out 10 Bernie Sanders supporters voted for Trump, and many turned to Green party nominee Jill Stein and Libertarian Gary Johnson.
Its simple. Liberals hate Clinton. For a woman who claims to be a women’s rights activist, she is married to a rapist. Bill Clinton is a sex offender, accused by Paula Jones, Juanita Broddrick and incessantly hit on Jenifer Flowers whom he had an affair with for years. Only Fox News was willing to cover these women’s sexual encounters with Bill. Not that Fox News cares, but they are the Conservative media, so it make sense. Clinton stayed with her adulterous husband even after the Lewinsky scandal, receiving the sympathy of Americans. As the MeToo era has begun, people are questioning her intentions and actions. She made all kinds of demeaning and slut shaming comments about the women who accused her husband of rape and publicly shamed Monica Lewinsky, who had a consensual affair with her husband.
Though she has worked for children’s rights, she defended a rapist in 1975, and let him get a light sentence, even though the perpetrator was a pedophile and rapist. Clinton often refrains from talking about it, not that she is asked about it often either, as the main stream media is on her side. During the entire 2016 Presidential campaign, the mainstream media: CBSN, ABC News, CNN, MSNBC, NBC and The New York Times were clearly in favour of her election and smeared both Sanders and Trump. Clinton blamed her loss in her book ‘What Happened’ on her friend Obama, the media, and her opponents whom the media regularly dismantled. Sadly, Sanders even helped Clinton during her campaign after she pillaged the primaries from him.
In addition, she is undoubtedly corrupt. She had a deal with the DNC, that if she financed the DNC who were on the verge of collapse, they would give her the nomination. The DNC pilfered the primaries from Sanders and handed it to Clinton, which was revealed though WikiLeaks. Clinton also plays a dirty game. She even got former DNC Chairperson, Debbi Wassermann Schultz on her side and interim chairman Donna Brazile to give her debate questions that would be asked by CNN, both of whom have resigned from the DNC today.
Secretary Clinton is a tone-deaf elite woman. She does not understand the needs of the American public. She has always been a centrist, and could not discern why those under 30, flocked to Bernie Sanders. She does not care about the progressive agenda, which is what the debt-ridden, underpaid, overworked American needs at the moment.
Not to mention, she’s absolutely careless. When WikiLeaks leaked her emails, it was found that classified information was sent to people from her personal email address which goes against State Department rules. The classified information could’ve been stolen and misused by terrorists and enemies of the country. She constantly denied that she did not send classified emails, then changed her narrative and lied about it until the end.
Clearly, the Hillary Clinton that did not change her name after getting married, the Clinton that fought for women’s and child’s rights has been replaced with a cold, calculative woman who is politically ambitious and is not willing to play fair. Her 600 page book was her being a cry baby, and getting over her defeat, unlike her Democratic counterpart, Bernie Sanders who has moved on. He did not complain about the primaries being rigged either. Clinton lacks moral decency, will do anything to be President, even stating that voting for her would elect the first female President. She clearly does not understand that its the policies that the American public cares about and not her gender.
They say karma is a bitch, and truly, Hillary who condemned sexism, as it happened to her, lost to one of the most sexist candidates in the United States.
They are loud mouthed, bellicose, making sexist, racist and outrageous remarks, which makes you want to recommend them to a psychiatrist. They are TV’s biggest arseholes and they have astronomical salaries, Twitter followers and we can’t love but hate them.
Here are TV’s most notorious men:
1.Charlie Sheen – this one is so obvious. We all have watched Two and a Half men, and witnessed Charlie’s meltdown. He is our favourite Latin American. He lost his job, sanity, wife and kids like a chain reaction. After he used a racial slur against Two and a half men producer Chuck Lorre, in a radio interview he got fired. He went on a American ‘winning’ tour in an attempt to make money, whilst living with porn stars and doing drugs. He came out and claimed to have AIDS, and is now sober.
2. Gordon Ramsey – he is TV’s most popular food critic. He is known for making acerbic comments, his lampooning and constant critiquing contestants and has made many of them cry on Master Chef and many other TV shows. There is just no pleasing this man. You will hardly hear him compliment anybody, and he acts like an insufferable know-it-all when it comes to food. Hey, as long as it gets ratings, who cares right? In real life, Gordon is known to be involved in philanthropy.
British chef and food critic Gordon Ramsey
3. Piers Morgan – if there is anybody who can come close to Gordon Ramsey a competition, its this man. This troll has landed himself jobs as a journalist on CNN, judge on America’s Got Talent, and a TV show host on ITV, purely based on his ability to critique, insult, make sexist remarks, argue and not let anyone answer any of his offensive questions.
British talk show host, Piers Morgan
4. Jeremy Clarkson – the biggest arsehole on television, and former host of Top Gear is undoubtedly one of TV’s biggest bad boy. He punched the producer of Top Gear, Oison Tymon and got fired, for obviously doing so. During his long reign as the host, he has made racist comments against every nationality that has existed on this planet, insulted cars, their makers and their drivers. He last had a gig on Amazon Prime to host another show, with the same concept as Top Gear.
5. Simon Cowell – this is obviously a no brainer. We all know that he is the King of Mean, and has insulted, got into arguments with people every show he has judged and produced be it America’s/Britain’s Got Talent/ American Idol or X factor. There were days when we secretly agreed with him, and days when we thought he was way too mean. And yet, we watched only for the sake of his nasty comments and insults. Nowadays, he seems to have mellowed down. He’s not as nasty or cranky anymore, no one seems to know why.
Simon Cowell
Who’s your favourite arsehole? Do you think they should still be in TV? Or be banned?
It is perfectly common for a Londoner to travel for long hours in the tube.
The ‘tube’ is London’s underground transport service. It is basically an underground train, which is one of the most popular modes of transport in the city. It is one of London’s oldest and quickest transit system. This tedious journey has its plus points as well. You can catch up on your reading, sleep or even work.
However, there are certain things Londoners do in the tube, which seems outlandish to some foreigners. Here are a list of common scenes which you can witness in a tube:
Kissing – Its not uncommon to see couples make out in the tube. Londoners are often affectionate with each other in public, so PDA is not something that receives a second glance.
A couple kissing in the tube
For those from conservative nations, this maybe shocking, or befuddling. Couple’s hug, lay on each other’s shoulder or cuddle, whilst the rest are unperturbed. The couple is never disturbed by others either.
Make-up – Another unsurprising scene to many Londoners is applying make-up during the journey.
If you’re a new commuter, then seeing women apply make-up during the entire journey initially seems amusing, as the fast moving train is not the best place to beautify yourself. Nonetheless, Londoners succeed in this seeming difficult task.
Sleeping – Whether they’re sitting or standing, Londoners manage to catch up on some sleep during the journey. Their sleep is usually undisturbed by the fast, jerky movements of the tube. The noise or commotion doesn’t awaken or annoy them in the least.
Music – Most commuters listen to music, and are lost in their own world. As they are regular commuters, they know when to get off and what station to get off, without listening to the announcements.
Conversations – There are numerous individuals who have important conversations with their lovers, colleagues, boss, and bankers. It is not abnormal to have people sitting next to you, giving their account numbers, or discussing confidential information. Irrespective of whether its irresponsible or not, Londoners still do it.
Catching up on the latest news- There are many people who catch up on the latest news on their ipad, phone or laptops whilst in the tube. Londoners also love to read newspapers, and many spend time doing crosswords.
There are legitimate reasons as to why women cheat
Why women cheat is not such a mystery if you really look at the dynamics of their relationships, and realize that women want just one thing above everything else – love.
I do not condone cheating of any kind in a relationship. This article is not a justification of women’s infidelity. I’m writing this article to explain why women cheat on their significant other. I want to explain the circumstances and the thought process that lead to their decision.
In order to satiate my curiosity about adultery, I engaged in conversations with several women and men to understand it better.
They say 50 per cent of couples stay together even after they discover their partner’s infidelity. I was astounded by this statistic. Being fiercely loyal in any relationship, I failed to understand this. To me cheating is unforgivable. It is a betrayal of my trust. But whether or not society likes to admit it, people always cheat for a reason. Not just because its habitual or the sex is not longer exciting.
I had made many observations, and my conversations with my friends confirmed my hypothesis. I asked a lot of my female friends and their partners about why they condoned cheating and why they cheated in relationships.
Here’s the list of reasons why women cheat.
He doesn’t love me/ treat me right
A lot of women turn to other men when their partner either neglects them, treats them like crap or ignores them. Women want men to give them love, attention and support. It’s not a constant, dire need. It’s something natural that both sexes want.
Men are known to neglect their partners for various reasons. Be it work, TV, video games or friends. This affects relationships in dangerous ways. It leads to resentment, hatred, anger and even women experience a sense of rejection.
One of my friends explained why she cheated because of this. “I didn’t want him to always hug and kiss me – it doesn’t always have to be about being physical. Couples aren’t lovey-dovey throughout their life-span of their relationship. I would like him to pay attention to me, and actually make a conversation. We would stay at home the whole day, and he would barely acknowledge my presence. So, unintentionally I turned to other guys. I ended up cheating for a span of two months after meeting a boy.”
She had a messy break-up, and she says she is not proud of cheating, but she feels angry and resents her ex-boyfriend for neglecting her.
He cheated on me first
This is rather obvious. The saying goes ‘Hell hath no fury like a woman’s scorn’. It’s true in many cases. One of my acquaintances recently got divorced, after being married for just a year. She was devastated when she found her husband cheating, just two months after their wedding. The relationship ended for her right there. She began seeing other men, one after the other. Her love for her now ex-husband died in a instant.
I questioned her as to why she didn’t wait until the divorce was finalised. Her answer was simple: “When he can cheat on me whilst we are married, why should I wait for a divorce? It’s my life. I can’t stop enjoying it because of him.”
She engaged in sexual relationships, dated several men whilst going through the divorce procedure. Women are expected to be holier than thou. We are considered to be the Virgin Mary. But that’s not true. People expect men to cheat and even brush it off. But women are labelled as sluts. Angered by this stereotype, the lady rebelled. And indeed, her ex-husband called her a slut. This further motivated her to continue seeing other men.
I fell in love with someone else
This is a rather devastating situation for women. Men who tend to be stoic or less affectionate will have women cheating on them. Men may defend themselves and say that it’s not in their personality to show love. But saying ‘I love you’, or physical contact goes a long way in a relationship. When men don’t kiss or hug their wives on occasion or a regular basis, it makes women feel unwanted. It also makes them feel less desirable.
I heard this story from another acquaintance. She married someone who was intellectually compatible, and was catalogue perfect. But two years after her marriage, she met a very interesting man, whom she fell for. She and her husband were the power couple in their family. They worked perfectly together, but they weren’t in ‘love’ with each other.
“We were always on the same page. We rarely argued. I could find no flaw with him. The sex was okay too. But he treated me like I was his colleague. He didn’t show any affection. We were so formal with each other. I would often see teenagers goofing around, and I would long for that. I was jealous of couples who engaged in PDA. My ex-husband and I were the dignified older couple. But I didn’t want that. I wanted the silly things and I wanted to be in love.”
These feelings constantly emerged in women whose partners tend to communicate less and rarely display emotion. It makes them question their partner’s love for them. “I fell in love with my current fiance, he is everything I wanted in a man. I married my ex because he was ‘compatible’. He never loved me either. He didn’t think love was necessary. It was just sex and giving gifts, nothing more…”
Giving presents and having sex out of obligation, will not ensure a successful relationship. No matter how materialistic a woman is, the feeling of being loved can compare to no other. It’s about time men realised this.
He is a playboy/ I didn’t know if he was serious
Men justify their flirtatious behaviour as acceptable, because society has given them a thumbs up. Women will be furious if their men’s eyes wander, when they have eyes only for him. While someone might feel helpless about the situation, some women would break-up with those men. Others engage in adultery. Women doubt whether such men actually love them or not. They will constantly be suspicious of their partner’s actions.
Whether its receiving a phone call from a female friend, a lot of texts at night, everything will arouse a sense of suspicion in women. Even having close female associates is frowned upon and it will be red flags in a relationship. This leads to them asking too many questions, and being inquisitive.
Playboys make it seem like love is a game which they have to play. They like the thrill of the chase, and ticking off women from their wish list. Dating such men makes women fell insecure. They are anxious while they are dating such men. Their heart becomes vulnerable, so they either put up their walls, or completely distrust their partner’s feelings because of their flirtatious behaviour.
If men do not openly admit that they are dating, women think its shady as well. Women begin to believe that the relationship is a joke to the man.
Another friend confessed to having an emotional affair, and even considered cheating multiple times. “My ex-boyfriend was a player, with numerous female friends. Some of them threw themselves at him, even in my presence. At first, I would condemn both of them. But I got emotionally involved with a male friend. Our emotional relationship was so intense, that I would always text my friend and I wouldn’t even notice my boyfriend flirting with other girls. It irked me when I would watch my boyfriend with other girls, and I would turn my friend for attention and comfort. I decided to it was time to part ways. If you look at it in one way, he basically drove me into the arms of another man.”
Though her boyfriend did not cheat, his reputation and frivolous demeanour led my friend to be unsure of his feelings. If men give off the vibe that they aren’t serious in a relationship, it gives women leeway to believe that they can have casual relationships with others as well.
Indian women should have the courage to walk away from their adulterous spouses
This woman divorced her cheating husband after many months of being taken for granted and made her own life in a country foreign to her. Read on.
Adultery. Once a phenomenon, now has become as common as a housefly. We aren’t surprised when we hear about it. A lot of couples stay together even after one of them was discovered cheating. What could possibly let a woman or man continue to stay with their cheating spouse?
Turns out, there are a lot of reasons. Women stay with their cheating husbands for very practical reasons and it has nothing to do with their children or societal pressure. A divorce is not an easy procedure. It’s expensive, complicated and time consuming. All of which a woman can’t handle easily while balancing heavy workload and emotional turmoil.
A lot of women go through this, including Alisha Joshua (name changed to protect the identity of the interviewee).
She is a 34 – year – old Indian born university professor, working in the United States. Joshua had an adulterous ex-husband. She has shared her story to give women strength to make the right decision to separate from their cheating spouses.
She was intrigued when she met Joseph Miller (name changed to protect the man’s identity). He was an Indian American. He worked as a music producer for a record label in the United States. Joshua, who was from Mumbai, was studying in Seattle when she bumped into Miller at a club.
Miller’s company was celebrating the success of their latest album, and one of her friends befriended Miller’s colleague. So they kept meeting frequently at parties and clubs. Joshua was undeniably attracted to Miller, who was a popular Casanova. “At first glance, he was nothing special. But he was always surrounded by women.” she recalled. “I assumed that it was because of his profession. And that caught my attention.”
Miller could be charming, confident and gentle whenever he wanted. And that’s how he won over Joshua. She was swayed with his personality and sweet talk. Soon, they became a couple.
But their blissful relationship lasted only a few months. As both of them were busy with their course and career respectively. “We both became busy, and we didn’t have time for dates.” she informed.
But as Miller’s workload kept piling up, he would spend days in the studio without contacting her. Unfortunately, crisis struck Joshua. She wanted to pursue her Master’s in the United States, but she won only a partial scholarship. So she decided to work to pay the rest of her fees. As a result, she couldn’t spend time with her boyfriend. This frustrated Miller who offered to pay the rest of her fees.
Joshua initially declined. But work became a vital part of her life, and it was taking a toll on her studies and health. “I collapsed in class due to exhaustion.” she said. “Miller was listed as my emergency contact and he was notified. Without consulting me, he paid the rest of my fees.”
Miller meant well, but this angered Joshua. She always fended for herself and didn’t even ask her parents for money. “I knew that he meant well. But he had no right to take charge of my life. That’s when we had our first falling out,” she explained.
Miller walked out on her that night and didn’t contact her for several days, repeating his usual pattern, whenever they argued. Also, he would give her presents, whenever he wanted to appease her. He manipulated her by giving her things she needed, so she couldn’t refuse him.
But problems wouldn’t leave Joshua. Her tenancy contract ended, and the landlord wouldn’t renew it. Once again, Miller became her knight in shining armour, much to Joshua’s dissatisfaction. He insisted that she move in with him. He was manipulating her and taking control of their relationship, which Joshua didn’t realise. She was too pre-occupied and exhausted with university to pay attention.
Though they lived together, they barely saw each other. They had different schedules and didn’t communicate on a regular basis. They barely went on dates, as they were fatigued. But surprisingly, they took their relationship to the next level.
“When I moved in, the inevitable happened. Yes, had sex. Not that we didn’t before. Just like every other man, Miller prided himself on his sexual prowess. He made it clear that he had experience. He didn’t brag about it. He showed it.” she chuckled.
But she didn’t match his expectation. “I’m an Indian, and premarital sex isn’t a part of every Indian’s lifestyle. He was my first. So obviously, I’m not as experienced. It bothered me. He was constantly dissatisfied,” she mentioned.
It was then that she started noticing the signs. He would come home at wee hours of the morning, claiming that he was locked up in the studio. He would initiate sex, but discontinue it abruptly. She observed how he was always exhausted, and couldn’t display his usual prowess in bed nor at work. He became cranky, distant and cold.
“I presumed that he was suffering from some of writer’s block. I’m an engineer, so I don’t know how the music business works. Nor am I creative, so I couldn’t offer comfort or advice.” she elucidated.
He stopped coming home, and would stay at his colleague’s place. She always had an inkling that he was cheating on her, but she gave him a benefit of a doubt, as she didn’t have proof. “I didn’t have the time to stalk him or fight him. I was struggling with university and I was under severe duress.” she defended.
But Miller’s career took off when he signed a now A-list singer to his record label. He was happier and they resumed their relationship. He came home every day, and would communicate with her. Joshua was sure that the problems had stopped, as they were in a good place. But once again, Miller shacked up in the studio for months. Joshua didn’t care either, as she was in her last semester. The lack of communication and presence led to a gap in their already tenuous relationship. Both of them never considered love or their partner a priority, which slowly ruined their relationship.
The once smiling, gentle and kind Miller turned his back on his girlfriend and ignored her. They wouldn’t talk to each other over the phone or message each other. They just discussed about things required for the house like grocery items and toilet paper. They had turned into ordinary roommates, which upset Joshua greatly.
Months passed, and the couple had good news, as Miller’s new A-list singer had a hit album and Joshua landed a job in a great company. At the height of happiness, both of them decided to get married. The couple presumed that by getting married, all the problems in their relationship would be solved.
She wonders what kind of idiotic logic she had come up with at that time.
“That was the wrong decision. It was a hasty decision. I was just 24. I was a love sick woman, who was over the moon.” she stated. “Married couples looked so happy. So I assumed that I could be happy if I was married. That was illogical. You cannot have the honeymoon stage in a marriage for the rest of your life. I learnt that the hard way. God knows what I was thinking!”
But the euphoria didn’t last time this time either. As Joshua had a stable timetable, her husband didn’t. He would miss dates, shoe up late, come home drunk and wouldn’t contribute to household chores.
He would bring his drunk friends home, and they would wreck their apartment, which angered Joshua to no end.
She had to pay all the bills from her income, as he was remiss with even necessary jobs.
Then, their arguments began. “The screaming, the shouting and bickering blew up. And we stopped talking to him, for good.” Miller mentioned.
After the first two years of marriage, Miller and Joshua indulged in their work, neglecting each other. Miller became irritable, and began ignoring his wife as well. He worked late and rarely slept. Joshua became concerned about his health and tried to make amends.
“I did whatever I could to mend our relationship. But he didn’t co-operate. He just preferred to be left alone. So I conceded.” she admitted. Another hurdle she had to overcome was geographical distance. She got transferred to San Francisco for nearly a year and a half. The only communication she had with his husband was through text message and phone calls.
By that time, she heard rumours that her husband’s company was doing well. Miller finally confessed that his company had invested a lot on their new talent, and he was stressed because of it. He displaced all his frustration on her and apologised.
They worked on their marriage and regularly had conversations. During their last conversation, Joshua believed that their marriage was back on track and they could be happy again. And then, the bombshell was dropped on her. She overheard a conversation between two women who worked in her husband’s company, when she was on the way to Los Angeles to surprise him. They were sitting behind Joshua on the plane.
“The girls were talking about Miller’s sexual escapades with a couple of models. They were hired after I left L.A., so they didn’t know who I was. I just happened to overhear their conversation. I had heard enough to confirm that they were talking about my husband and not anyone else with the same name.” she said.
Her husband was constantly having one-night stands and he continued to fool her. His friends and colleagues never bothered to tell her the truth. Instead of crying or prying the women for more information, she decided to confirm this with solid evidence.
She hired a detective to investigate her husband’s exploits. “The first time, the detective told me that all my husband did was work. So I still had hope.” she explained. “But then, within the third week of investigation, I received a package from the detective. There was photographic evidence, with copies of bank statements on the presents that my husband had bought for his concubines.”
That was the end of the marriage for Joshua. She was shattered. She was depressed for days, and locked herself in her room for a week. She didn’t confront her husband. “I picked myself up and continued work. But I gradually stopped loving my husband,” she expressed. “Day and after day, the love faded away. I didn’t like him anymore.”
So she ignored his phone calls and text messages at first. She didn’t understand why he married her, if he wanted to sleep with other girls. But she began to be curt and polite with him. She faked interest and made empty conversations. But she couldn’t avoid him forever.
After pulling herself together, she consulted a lawyer. As the divorce procedure is long and complicated for international marriages, she didn’t have the time or money for it. So she didn’t know what to do. If she confronted her husband, he would blame his infidelity on her.
“I know that men are experts at blaming their wives for everything. So I was aware of how the argument would go down. I didn’t bother fighting with him,” she explicated. “So I continued avoiding him. I focused on my career instead.”
Her boss offered a permanent placement in San Francisco, only on the condition that she would do a project in Seattle for six months. So she decided to take the job.
The day before she left for Seattle, she received a phone call from her detective. He informed her that her husband had fathered a child with one of his mistresses and paid for her abortion. That was it. Joshua had reached her breaking point. “I was not going to file for divorce. I had made no plans for that. After I found out, I had it. I did it. I quickly began making plans to annul our marriage or divorce him. I didn’t care how long the procedure took.”
She didn’t understand what she hand done wrong to make him cheat. But she didn’t care anymore. As she was hunting for attorneys, she came across an Indian gentlemen based in Washington, who happened to be a family friend. She narrated her story and he agreed to fight her case, without receiving any payment. The attorney’s sister went through a similar experience, hence he sympathised.
“It was by God’s grace and my mother’s prayers that I met him at the right time. The same goes for overhearing those girls talk about Miller. It may sound ridiculous in this era, but I think God has his way of helping you.” she stated.
Some of her friends knew about his cheating and kept it from her as they were envious. None of her friends could get rich husbands or successful careers. Even his colleagues thought of her as a country bumpkin from India whom Miller married on a whim.
So she decided to live separately, without informing her husband of her arrival in Seattle. She would lose her spousal visa if she left him, but her company couldn’t sponsor her work visa. Despite this, she filed the papers and let her attorney handle the rest.
“I wasn’t going to leave him because of the spousal visa. But I’m glad I did. Women often stay in marriages for reasons like expensive divorces, children and spousal visas. But if you’re in a toxic marriage, how will you ever be happy?” she voiced. “I got lucky and received help, otherwise, I would’ve landed in a dumpster if Miller decided to leave me first.”
The divorce procedure was messy, lengthy, and emotionally taxing. However, she was granted spousal support. Simultaneously, she had applied for a teacher’s training programme in New York, for which she was selected. She completed her training, on a student visa. She applied for a job as a teaching assistant in one the most reputed institutions in the United States. She got the job, and is now working as a full-time professor in that university.
“Just because you’re in your 20s, doesn’t mean that you’re in love. So think twice before you get hitched. Or else, you will have to go through experience the emotional turmoil I did. It doesn’t matter if you lose financial stability. You can always make money. But you can’t escape a marriage. You can only separate from your husband.”
When she asked her husband why he cheated, his answer made laugh. “He didn’t like the fact that I didn’t need him emotionally, financially or sexually. Also, he blabbered something about not being good in bed and not being there for him. I think it’s absolute garbage. Actually, he needed a submissive woman, which I was and now am not. I’m glad that I have this personality, other men would trample all over me.”
Joshua doesn’t want to get married again. She encourages women to focus on their careers and stop wasting time with men. “I still haven’t forgiven my ex-husband. I’m not a sati savitri or a heroine in an unrealistic TV show. I’m human. I still hate my husband, and still curse him to death for ruining my life. I still argue with him when he doesn’t give me the spousal support on time,”she states.
“We hate each other’s guts and avoid talking to each other at all costs. There is plenty of animosity still within me. I don’t know what he blames me for, or why I married him. But I can say this, women should never stay with their adulterous husband. No matter how difficult the situation is, leave that man, fight for alimony and don’t stay with him because the world will comment on it.” she avers.
In India, divorced women are ostracised, shunned and avoided at all costs. They are considered disgusting and bad wives, even if the man is at fault. That’s not the case in the United States, as it’s a normal procedure there. Joshua never returned to India as she didn’t want to deal with societal nonsense and gossip.
“San Francisco is my home now,” she states. “I got my passport changed, and now I’m an American citizen.”
She says everything happens for the best, as her current job pays better and she can pursue her actual dream of teaching. Her career is her only priority, and she isn’t bound by anyone. “I’m free,”she states. “Both from him and society. I am Ms. Independent!”
Nationality – British Achievement – Beddoes became the first female editor of England’s most reputed weekly newspaper, The Economist, in 2015. History – Beddoes began to work for the newspaper in 1994, as the business affairs and economics editor. Fun fact – not only is she an Oxford-Harvard graduate, but has also worked as an economist in the International Monetary Fund!
Esther Htusan
Esther Htusan
Nationality – Burmese Achievement – she is the first and the only Burmese journalist to win a Pulitzer prize! History – she works for the Associated Press and helped uncover the labour abuse in the Southeast Asian fishing industry in April 2016. Fact – The pubished report on her investigation helped free 2,000 slaves from bonded labour!
Barbara Walters
Barbara Walters
Nationality – American Achievement – she is the first female journalist to become a co-anchor of a network evening news programme in the United States. History – Walters was hired by ABC in 1976, to co-anchor the 20/20 show with Harry Reasoner. She is one of the most powerful female journalist’s in the United States. She has hosted her own talk show and co-hosted many other shows. Fact – she has interviewed world leaders like Fidel Castro, Moammar Gadhafi and Yugo Chavez.
Somayya Jabarti
Somayya Jabarti
Nationality – Saudi Arabian Achievement – she is Saudi Arabia’s first and only female editor-in-chief of a national newspaper. She heads the ‘Saudi Gazette’. History – she was the deputy editor of this newspaper. She has helped women gain their economic rights, by giving them jobs in her newspaper. Fact – she is the only female journalist to be promoted to this post in her country.
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